Kids Thoughts On 'The Sea' -

BRILLIANT ! Pure Gold

I have no doubt that you would agree that the honesty and candid communication that children offer up is by far the most pure form of enjoyment and entertainment.

Before we get to the original point of  this post, please indulge me by allowing me to share  with you this most funny of tales about how a particular child  'Really Saw His Dad'!

During my early years as a Shopping Centre Marketing Manager, I launched a fathers day 'draw and color-in' competition.  I have never forgotten the winning entry, titled 'my Dad shaving', we all  just broke up when this arrived.  It was the obvious winner, a decision, fully supported by the attending crowd when it was displayed on the day as the  'winning entry'. It also managed to make the local paper!

The children were asked to 'Draw A Picture Of  Dad' and color it in ...  Thank heavens, the 'Dad' in question,  although a little embarrassed could not help but see the funny side of it too. (I have had the picture 'reproduced' for the purpose of this post).

my dad shaving - V Deighton

Kids Thoughts On 'The Sea' -

Back to our post subject - these fabulous perceptions of the sea were offered up by children ranging on age from 5 to 7 years when asked to give their teacher their thoughts on the sea, its creatures, its beauty and its dangers... too funny!! Enjoy!

- This is a picture of an octopus. It has 'eight testicles'. (Kelly 6)

- 'Oysters' balls' are called pearls. (James 6)

- If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea all round you, 'you are incontinent'. (Wayne 7)

- Sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, 'just like Emily Richardson'. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie 6)

- A dolphin 'breaths through an assehole' on the top of its head. (Billy 7)

- My dad goes out in his boat, and 'comes back with crabs'. (Emily Burniston 5)

- When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean. Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to make the wind come. 'My brother said they would be better off eating beans'. (William 7)

- I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. 'How do mermaids get pregnant'? (Helen 6)

- Some fish are dangerous. Jellyfish can sting. Electric eels can give you a shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think 'they have to plug themselves into chargers'. (Christopher 5)

- When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and 'it makes my willy small'. (Kevin 6)

- Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can't go down alone, 'so they have to go down on top of each other'. (Becky 7)

- On holiday at the breach my Mum went water skiing. She fell off when she was going very fast. She says she won't do it again because 'water went up her fanny'. (Julie 7).

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