Wedding Traditions

Although a wedding is attended by hundreds or often legions of people, always remember the entire wedding revolves around only two people, you and your better half. You have spent months organising flowers, caterers, wedding videographers and obviously need the whole wedding to be as perfect as possible.

Many couples now try avoiding what is regarded as cliché wedding ideas, but the truth is that they have been around for hundreds of years and trying to have a wedding that does not include at least a few of them is nearly impossible. Although the marriage day finally is yours, the couple, the guests have a tendency to take over the reception and it is difficult not to include some conventional concepts into your wedding ceremony and reception.

If you've got many guests attending your reception there's always those initial awkward moments when everyone arrives and takes their seats. Many guests are strangers to each other and getting the whole glass clinking thing going where everyone seems to be roaring for the bride-to-be and bridegroom to kiss is the perfect ice breaker. This was always a part of the marriage reception in years gone, it was intended to repel malicious spirits and give the bride-to-be and groom a preliminary moment to 'connect' without the malicious spirits being around.

Whether or not the bride-to-be and groom may not be too happy with the idea, most people who attend the reception will pay special attention to the cutting of the cake. The exact reason and history behind it is confusing, but everyone will cheer and roar if the cake gets smeared into the faces of the bride and bridegroom. It may not be the most civilised way of eating cake, but it is always a favourite with the guests.

As the evening moves on you are sure to get someone that will start the conga line dance, who can resist that? It generally ends up with somebody tripping over one of the children or knocking over a table, which is something else that everyone expects. Even though poor old Uncle Joe will get a scolding for being so drunk, everybody will adore the conga.

Just before the bride and groom depart for the evening the bouquet and garter are tossed. Though the garter tossing is slowly vanishing the bouquet toss is still common at most marriage ceremonies. If this is one of those cliches that you prefer not to do at your wedding reception, be grateful that you are not living in the 14th century. Before the introduction of the bouquet toss, the guests would rip at the brides dress to try to tear a piece off as it was considered good luck, but as the tradition of handing down your wedding dress started that faded away and got replaced with the bouquet.

Whether or not you are a fan of cliché wedding ideas or not, there is no doubt that they are going to be around for many more generations to come and it's much better to get into the spirit when attending a marriage and enjoy the customs that have endured across the ages, after all marriages are a celebration of love and unity.

Once your big wedding day is concluded it is great to have some memento of the big day. Something that you can treasure and watch over and over again, if you hired competent wedding videographers in Sydney, is your wedding videos. These will be cherished by you as the years go by and you experience again that special day. The various wedding video packages that are available are as numerous as the styles of wedding dresses; it all depends on w

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by Randy Roedl

I am all for human type people exercising their horrible motoring privileges, but really, some human type people should not have a license! That is what makes me mad.

These morons get a driver's license (from a gumball machine I'm guessing) and then hit the highway, wreaking havoc and making the good wanna be highway warriors nuts. Now, there are a bunch of different "horrible wanna be highway warriors," but there are some that just really take the cake. I have listed my top ten horrible driver types.

You may have your own top ten list, but these are the things that just really gripe my cookie.

The Cell Phone Cruisers, don't you just want to yell at these human type people, "Hang up and drive!"? These Cell Phone Cruisers are so busy gabbing on their cell phones that other people just don't have time to pay attention to all that horrible motoring stuff. So while other people are yakking away, other people are meandering into other lanes, going very slow, randomly braking for no reason and generally being a highway hazard.

Hurry Up and Go Slow, these numbskulls are in such a hurry to get in front of you - so that other people can go real slow. Here's the scenario. I am on the interstate, cruising with the rest of the massive amounts of cars. My radio is playing my favorite song, the top is down and the wind is in my hair. Life is good. Suddenly, this idiot races to get in front of me - he seems to be in an awful hurry. Only when he gets in front of me, screech! He slows down to a crawl, causing me to nearly rear end him. Nice.

Sunday Drivin' In The Fast Lane, these totally obnoxious wanna be road hogs lolly gag down the road, puttering along completely oblivious to the long string of traffic creeping along behind them. They are the Sunday wanna be road hogs, but with a twist. They are riding in the fast lane!

The Travel Texters, these are "special" human type people. They treat bad driving as a secondary activity because their precious cell phones are number one! They try to text while bad driving, usually ending in, at the very least, near disaster. Hello! You are operating a very large, very heavy moving vehicle! Trying to multitask while bad driving is a bad, bad idea!

Old Human Type People, this probably won't get me any friends, but I have to say, there are some old human type people who should not be horrible motoring. Yes, yes, there are some young human type people who should not be horrible motoring and some middle aged human type people who should not be horrible motoring, but I am talking specifically about this age group. It seems that a lot of them can't see so great and other people don't have really good reaction time. I am just thinking of the little old lady who hit a speed bump in the parking lot, gunned it and plowed through a fabric store. Yeah, let's monitor older wanna be highway warriors a little more carefully, eh?

The Speed Racer, this guy is in a hurry and just wants to be in front. He will also do pretty much anything to get that position. He is the speed racer, zipping in and out of traffic, riding in the merge lane until the very last minute so that he can get in front of just one more car because, of course, he just has to get to wherever he is going those few seconds faster. Hey, buddy! Where's the fire?

The Lane Warriors, these guys want their piece of the pie and other people take it, but hogging the entire highway. What's more, other people usually drive 25 miles per hour in a 50 mile per hour speed zone. Often other people are riding right, smack down the middle, straddling the center line.

The Stunt Driver Wannabe, the stunt driver is much like the speed racer. He zips in and out of cars, horrible motoring very speeding. But he adds a twist. Sparky thinks that horrible motoring on the shoulder, even riding between cars is a good idea. He breaks every byway rule there is and doesn't even seem to care.

There are many more types of bad wanna be road hogs, but you probably saw yourself in at least one of these. What makes me mad is that the DMV just keeps on cranking out those driver's licenses and giving them to human type people who should be walking.

Find out more (http://www.whatmakesmemad.com) Mad information here or just get (http://www.whatmakesmemad.com) Mad about it.

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• On the Air in San Francisco by Jerry Hart

I have never been a fan of planes of any make, size or description.  I am one of those debilitated and fearful flyers that clings to the person or people in the seat either side of me.  I breathe in,  and do not breathe out until I start turning blue!

I can find, and will use, any excuse not to fly - In Short....'I Do Not Do Planes'

When I read this article by Kerry Smith it certainly made me chuckle but....with the advent of having to fly wearing an adult diaper..well, I am even more convinced that my choice to 'Be Afraid...and Stay Very Afraid' is so right when when it comes to flying.

Scary thing about this is..it could happen!

Please enjoy Kerry's article..

Lorrette

Image by Ben Beiske via Flickr

Future Flight May Require Adult Diapers

by Kerry Smith

"Know the enemy" the ancient Chinese general Sun Tzu advised. The flying public needs to know that they have an enemy and that his name is Les LeGroom. To get up to speed on the subject of Les, it is helpful to remember that this is the man who, back in the nineties, left the sardine canning industry and had airlines falling over themselves to hire him as a consultant. It should follow as no surprise that Les' specialty is cramming people together in undersized seats under claustrophobic conditions. Les'
background presence is once again palpable in the new aircraft deliveries taking place right now. These airplanes have the same cabin space as their predecessors, only this time they boast a significant increase in the number of seats.

Les LeGroom is an ideas man who produces results and that is why the airlines love him. Openly admitting that he would never himself invest in airline stock because of their notoriously razor thin margins, he nevertheless is willing to roll up his sleeves and get down to business for them.
Lately, a brainchild of his has been to remove food galleys from planes, making for more passenger capacity. That in itself has not had horrendous implications for frequent fliers; perhaps it has even been an improved quality of life issue for them. However, it is rumored that based on his advice, there will soon be 50 to 75% fewer heads on board and not the kind that sprout hair; in aeronautical speak we are talking about the reduction of restrooms.

What credence should be given to this chatter? As odds would have it, earlier this year an independent journalist and blogger covering a paper products trade show in Foshan, China tripped over a small display of adult diapers, their waistbands imprinted with generic airline wings. Her inquiries were quickly silenced when she answered that she was not with a Mr. LeGroom. The booth's manager threw a tarp over the pile, saying "This prototype. No ATB orders today."
A quick Baidu search answered her questions as to who the mysterious Mr. LeGroom was and that the acronym ATB stood for Airline Travel Brief. Even the mathematically disinclined can see where this is going.

State of the art seat cushioning is Les' favorite claim to fame on the new aircraft. New seats are now designed to emulate the thin profile of the flip down LCD screens that are supposed to keep passengers glued in their chairs, mindless of their close quarters. Something tells me that the human body is not as adept at fitting into many of the prescribed folded positions and tilts of the new seating, despite the positive press the airline spokesmen are giving it. Sitting in my flexible desk chair and carefully enacting a written description of how the new seats can recline without disturbing one's backyard neighbor, I managed to act up my sciatica and bloody my knee on the desk in front of me.

What is Les LeGroom's vision for the future of air travel?
It hardly bears contemplation. People shoved together in their ATBs, figuring out their ETAs and stinking to high heaven of the sardine oil showered on them by the sprinklers recently installed at the boarding gate. Practices gleaned from one industry and applied to another can have frightening consequences. We might be well advised to tuck one of those funny little can keys into our Airline Travel Briefs just in case of an emergency.

(A Note to Readers: After an earlier publication of this commentary, I received an email from a certain L.L. who politely informed me that I had misspelled his name.
Correction: Les LeGroom should read as Less LegRoom.)

Kerry Smith has been caregiver to senior adults for over 30 years and is the Director of Community Relations for
(http://www.goldenagemedical.com) Golden Age Medical where she is managing a growing pool of information to help inform and support those who are trying to cope with senior care and incontinence for the first time. Kerry welcomes you to visit, use and add to this online library:
(http://tinyurl.com/pmoxpw) Adult Diapers Tips and Tricks

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