It Appears..Men Have New Rules!

Lorrette No Comments
Last Updated:: September 21, 2009

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I guess it had to happen. A guy has taken the time to sit and write all these 'Mens Rules' down for us ladies to read and understand...so I am told.

We always hear "the rules" from the female point of view, he says. Finally, the guys' side of the story is now out in the open for all women to read - (I must admit, it's pretty funny)

The rules as presented to me from the male point of view are listed below, and have all been numbered ‘#1’. I am told this has been done on purpose.

: Image via Wikipedia

These are their Mens Rules - 2009 Edition!

1. Men are NOT mind readers. – THIS IS THE FIRST & FOREMOST RULE

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You are big girls. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports, are like the full moon, or the changing of the tides. SO…Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one:

Subtle hints do not work!

Strong hints do not work!

Obvious hints do not work!

Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends give you and what they are for.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become ‘Null and Void after 7 Days’..

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, then remember…please, please remember (write it down if need be) ‘We Meant The Other One!’

1. You can either ask us to do something , or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, NOT A COLOR. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that. Get used to it.

1. If we ask what is wrong and "you say nothing," - We will act like nothing is wrong. We know you are lying, but to us, it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.... Really!

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as Formula 1, Golf, Cricket or Rugby.

1. You have more than enough clothes.

1. You have far too many pairs of shoes.

1. I am in ok shape. Round IS a shape!

1. I do not play with your sewing machine...please do not touch my electronic .."anything", or my tools, or my car!

It appears our men, in an effort to appear polite, have added these closing words ….

'Thank you ladies for reading our rules. Yes, we know, we will probably have to sleep on the couch for a while, we really don't mind that you know! It's like camping!'

Has anyone written any 'Womens Rules'? If you have please let us have them so that we can post our own requirements as to 'Life from a Woman's Point of Rule'.

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